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Hjemme i København | Jeg kom hertil, da jeg var 19 år…

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Mens vi sidder og drikker tyrkisk kaffe, fortæller A mig lidt om hende selv (for en uge siden sagde hun til mig, at hun ikke ville fortælle mig noget som helst om hende selv). Idag er hun vendt tilbage, smilende og åbner sig helt for mig.

Jeg blev født tæt på Beograd, og jeg kom hertil, da jeg var 19 år.
Mine forældre kom herop tidligt for at finde arbejde, da jeg var 11 år, og mig og min bror blev i Serbien og boede hos min bedstemor.
Fra jeg var 11 til 19 år, voksede jeg op hos hende, men der var meget tid, hvor jeg var alene. Min bedstemor skulle arbejde på landet, og min bror var ikke meget hjemme.
Jeg gik i skole, arbejdede nogle timer, hvor jeg hjalp min bedstemor, og derudover læste jeg breve for folk, der ikke selv kunne læse.
Jeg kan huske, at jeg nogle gange spiste hos sigøjnerne, og når jeg kom tilbage til huset, så vidste jeg, at aftensmaden var et stykke brød og en smule ost. Så jeg foretrak at spise hos sigøjnerne. De spurgte mig altid, om jeg var sulten, og jeg svarede “JA!”, og så gav de mig mad.
Jeg mindes, da jeg var 15 eller 16 år gammel. Der kom nogle håndværkere for at lave noget på huset eller nabohuset, og en af dem var meget smuk. Han var 21 år gammel, havde langt hår og var meget velopdragen. Vi kiggede meget på hinanden, og vi kunne rigtig godt lide hinanden, men jeg kunne ikke sige noget til min bedstemor. Alt sådan noget var totalt forbudt.
Indtil en dag hvor vi aftalte at mødes på vej hjem fra min skole. Vi snakkede lidt, og så kyssede vi hinanden, meget uskyldigt det hele. Bare nogle kys og lidt snak.
Men da jeg kom hjem, så havde min bedstemor fundet ud af det. Hun slog mig meget, hun var virkelig hård nogle gange.
Jeg tror, det var fordi, hun selv havde haft et meget hårdt liv. Hun havde det hårdt under krigen og mistede sin mand, da hun var meget ung, og bagefter også sin søn. Hun led meget.
Jeg har kun en søn på 20 år, vi kunne ikke få flere. Jeg har haft fem mistede fødsler, jeg blev syg og til sidst sagde lægen, at jeg ikke kunne få flere børn.
Jeg bor med min søn, fordi jeg er skilt fra min mand.
Min søn har en kæreste. De har været sammen siden, de var 15 eller 16 og er meget forelskede. De ses hver dag.
Jeg synes, de er meget unge til at gifte sig. Jeg vil gerne have, at min søn han lever lidt mere, før han gifter sig. Jeg tror, at hvis man gifter sig ung, så holder det ikke længe. Men de kan lide hinanden. Lad os se, hvad der sker.
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